Writer's Block: Wardrobe Malfunction

[Error: unknown template qotd]Probably the last, and most embarrassing (had I been aware of it) would be my friend's wedding before I came to Japan.  The bride was in red and black, and I was head to toe in black.  I had previously ordered a black satin fishtail skirt from that lovely "Gothic Clothing Emporium" in Camden, whose name I currently forget, but when I went to the shop the week before they had completely lost track of the order.  So I had to run round the Camden Stables Market looking for a suitable replacement.  Being about 10kg heavier than I am now, the skirt I finally chose was quite tight fitting, but not impossible to wear.

Anyway, at some point during the wedding ceremony the zip at the back broke.  Whether this was actually before or during, I have no idea, and I shudder when I imagine hitting the aisle with my butt crack on show.  After the ceremony my Mum came rushing over and told me she could see my behind.  I spent the next hour trying to locate safety-pins.  The hotel mysteriously had none (liars) and my friend Tom kindly walked into Windsor town centre to find me some, making himself late for dinner.  I managed to piss off my parents by making my Dad come all the way back over to Windsor with a change of clothes for me too.

No one has claimed to noticing anything, so I think I got away with it.  Until now...